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Sex is for every body! Limited mobility, disability, a chronic medical condition, arthritis, or age-related joint stiffness doesn’t have to preclude you or your partner from intimacy and sexual pleasure. Sex is about more than penetrative sex—that’s only one type. There are myriad different ways to enjoy sexual pleasure, partnered or solo.
Just as canes, wheelchairs, grab bars and other mobility aids help meet the human need for independence, sexual aids and sex toys for people with mobility issues help meet the need for sex and closeness. They are more than just a way to spice things up in the bedroom. They are a way to make sex accessible and possible.
There are few sex toys marketed specifically as “accessible sex toys” or “sexual aids for people with disabilities or limited mobility.” We hope to see that change in the near future. However, there are many sexual aids and toys that adapt well or have features that lend themselves to use by people with mobility limitations.
Here are some of our favorites.
First, some considerations…
- Battery-powered vibrators tend to be less expensive but louder (possibly a concern if you’re in shared housing). Small vibrators often require watch batteries, which are difficult to handle, or multiple larger batteries, which can make the device heavy. Over time, the cost of replacing the batteries may overtake the lower initial purchase price.
- Electric/plug-in vibrators tend to be the strongest on the market. There’s no need to worry about recharging or changing batteries, but they are often loud. Also be aware that urine is mostly water, and of course water and electricity don’t mix! If incontinence during sexual activity is an issue, be safe and choose a different option.
- Rechargeable vibrators are more expensive but tend to be quieter. They are easy to recharge with a USB cable. Many are waterproof as well.
- Check for allergens with any toy or lubricant. Also be aware of the quality of the materials. Some lower-quality toys are made with cheap plastics that aren’t good for sensitive genital tissues. Look for body-safe materials. Many good-quality toys are made from body-safe or even medical grade silicone, which also feels flexible and silky against the skin.
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Use a wand vibrator to extend your reach.
If you have difficulty bending or reaching, the Doxy Wand, Hitachi Magic Wand and Lovehoney Extra Powerful Massage Wand have extra-long handles that extend your reach. The total length of each of these wands is over a foot.
These are extremely strong vibrators, which may be helpful if you need intense stimulation due to lessened sensitivity. They are so powerful, in fact, that you may want to try the vibrator through a towel or blanket first, especially on the higher settings!
The tennis ball-like head on these vibrators provides very broad vibration, so if you prefer more targeted stimulation, you may want to purchase the optional wand attachments. There are attachments available for external clitoris and penis stimulation, as well as internal G-zone (anterior vaginal wall) and P-zone (prostate) stimulation.
Wand vibrators can be used for all-over massage, too. If you want a sexual aid that doubles as a back massager, a wand vibrator will do the trick.
You should be aware that these wand vibrators are quite heavy. If wrist or hand strength is a concern, you may need to try a lighter toy or prop the wand up against your body or a pillow. Or, you can use a toy mount, which we’ll discuss in a minute.
Give or receive hands-free penis stimulation.
Conditions that affect fine motor skills such as arthritis, amputation, cerebral palsy, multiple sclerosis and Parkinson’s can make the traditional up-and-down motion associated with masturbation (or giving manual sex—a “hand job”) difficult. Also, fatigue can be a factor if longer sessions are needed due to aging or other conditions that lead to loss of sensitivity.
The Hot Octopuss PULSE SOLO ESSENTIAL delivers pleasure and orgasm hands-free, and can even be used when the penis is flaccid. An erection isn’t needed to use and enjoy it! The penis fits inside the toy, which delivers pulsing, oscillating stimulation.
If intense vibration is uncomfortable, try a suction-based stimulator instead.
If arthritis or weakened hands make it difficult to hold a vibrator—or if the vibration itself is uncomfortable or too much—suction toys offer a different type of stimulation. They use air to produce a sucking sensation. Some do not vibrate at all, while others offer gentle vibration in combination with the suction.
These toys are usually marketed as clitoral stimulators, but they can be used on the nipples or other erogenous zones. The Satisfyer 2 Pro, the Womanizer line, and the We-Vibe Melt are good examples.
Try Liberator wedges and toy mounts for sexual positioning.
As we wrote about in our article on Sex Wedges, Pillows & Cushions, Liberator wedges are invaluable tools for comfortable sexual positioning. Their ergonomic shape and firm foam support the body much better than standard pillows, and can help take pressure off of painful joints and tissues. They also have a waterproof liner under a plush cover, which makes them easy to clean.
Liberator sex wedges are ideal for people with mobility limitations, as they keep the body comfortably in position. Elevating the receptive partner’s hips with a wedge pillow during intercourse makes deeper penetration possible with less effort, helping limit strain and fatigue for both partners. It can also help prevent sore necks and cramped wrists during oral or manual sex.
Liberator toy mount cushions hold a wand, vibrator and/or dildo securely in place. If straddling is comfortable for you, these cushions provide an option for hands-free stimulation and/or penetration.
If pelvic movement is difficult or uncomfortable during strap-on sex, try a thigh or hand harness.
Most strap-on dildos are worn in the position of a penis, using a pelvic harness or special underwear. But if pelvic movement is limited or uncomfortable, there are other strap-on options. An adjustable leg harness allows the receptive partner to ride on the dildo without putting pressure on the wearer’s pelvis. It also keeps the hands free for other activities.
A hand harness can be used instead of a standard pelvic harness or to hold onto a dildo or similarly sized vibrator if you have difficulty with grip.
If gripping a vibrator is difficult, try a wearable vibrator.
Wearable vibrators come in all shapes and sizes, for penis, clitoris and all-over stimulation. Some have remote controlled options, so you can program your favorite routine or please a partner.
Finger vibrators, like the Lovehoney Ignite 20 Function, are another option. They slip over one or two fingers and can be easily incorporated into favorite touches. We recommend choosing a high-quality rechargeable finger vibrator, as they tend to deliver stronger vibrations for their size over battery-powered, and don’t require you to fiddle with tiny watch batteries.
Use bondage tape to attach or adapt sex toys.
Bondage tape is designed to stick only to itself—it doesn’t stick to skin or leave a residue on surfaces. That makes it perfect to help improve grip or to adapt sex toys for more comfortable use. For example, you might use bondage tape to attach a vibrator to a reaching aid.
What is the take-home message?
Sexual pleasure is for every body. Sex toys and sexual aids like the ones discussed above can help make solo and partnered sex more accessible. Just as mobility aids help meet the human need for independence, accessible sex toys and sexual aids help meet the need for sex and closeness.
As per our Terms of Use, this article is for general educational and informational purposes only and is not meant to serve as a substitute for professional medical advice. Consult with your own physician or health care practitioner regarding the use of any information received here before using or relying on it. Your physician or health care practitioner should address any and all medical questions, concerns and decisions regarding the possible treatment of any medical condition.
